We, who were called to be your people

Emotionally, I'm currently some sort of controlled chaos.
Recently, I came under the realization that I'm really beautiful. That God designed me to have a natural beauty, and that I was messing with Him when I allowed myself to hear the lie that I'm ugly.
Here's something not good, though: it is getting harder and harder for me to submit to the authority here. I was out with a sessionmate today discussing it and it turned into me crying about how I've never really had a dad. How much I resent authority because my dad never earned my trust, so I could never respect him. I force authority figures to earn my respect and trust, when really I have no right to ask that. Still, though, it gets harder and harder for me to hold my tongue and harder to not just brush people off.
Pray that.
I love you (and probably miss you)
Caitlyn.